Posts Tagged ‘real life BDSM relationships’

BDS&M Episode #8: Lady Hamilton, a Real Femdom Cuckoldress from History

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In the first of our new segments on real dominant women from history, we study the life of Emma Hamilton. We cover both the history as well as the astrology behind Emma Hamilton’s extraordinary life. We cover the origin stories of Emma and William Hamilton, as well as Lord Horatio Nelson. We go into great detail about all known historical events surrounding one of the most famos episodes of cuckoldry in history, and how Emma Hamilton used her sexual prowess to control all the men who entered her orbit.

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Welcome to Reality or, Things I Learned From My Temporary Engagement Ring

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Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Welcome to 2010.

Now that that‘s out of the way, onto more crucial matters.

For those as-of-yet somehow unaware, Mister P and I got engaged during our pre-Holidays Vegas trip. It truly was one of the happiest moments in my life to date — and still is. I even have a wonderful temporary engagement ring to prove it.

It do indeed sparkle, all the same.

Honestly, the engagement ring is a symbol of a lot more than being engaged. It’s something of a primer for a marriage.

Allow me to explain, oh, disbelievers.

Unless you’ve done it, you can’t fathom the feeling of wearing an engagement ring — or, well, being female. (Though there are cultures that allow men to wear them, and I’m inclined to have Mister P do the same, since our engagement will be a longish one, it’s not typical in Western society.) The attention it gets you, the reminder of what’s to come, and … the upkeep.

Oh, yes. The maintenance. The way it impacts your daily life — in fact, every minute of it. Now, sure you can say, to hell with all of it, and let it gets banged-up, tarnished, the stones chipped or lost, or the whole thing can just become dull and lose its lustre. You’ll still get attention — but of the negative kind. People will notice your once-lovely, or could-have-remained-beautiful ring and wonder what happened.

This is a perfect, and I mean perfect metaphor for a relationship transitioning into a marriage.

Once the glass slipper fits, and the white horse awaits, life is what happens — and don’t let Hollywood or the faerie-tales of old fool you. In order for a relationship to keep its shine as it becomes a marriage — and after — it takes lifestyle changes, and more attention and dedication on your behalf than you ever thought possible. Now, you’re paying attention to every little thing that you do throughout your day. And, if you’re (well, female) and anything like me, you’re constantly either washing your hands, cleaning something, applying lotion, makeup, cleansers, typing, straightening things, racing around and getting other things done, and knocking into things in your way (at times). Which are all habits that will destroy a ring worn daily and of great value.

Now, you could, as mentioned before, forgo the whole thing — and just take it off. Completely. And wear it only when it’s convenient for you. Instead, you’re supposed to care for it; keep it in a jewellery box at night, polish it during the day, and carefully clean it frequently. And it will sparkle and draw attention from the world to admire its beauty and brilliance. It doesn’t have to be a diamond, or even similar to. It can just be a $15 buck piece of Austrian crystal in an imported-from-Spain designer collection picked up in the unlikeliest of places, (Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament Park) to serve a purpose. It’ll still sparkle, still shine, and still show the world that you’re not only taken and happy about it, but that you’re proud of that fact.

Our subconscious minds process billions of information. Billions. That means everything that happened to you as a kid, and now, gets filed away in this endless library of bullshit that dominates your entire existence. Fact. (Well, theory, but you get the idea. Widely popular, widely held theory.) And if you don’t think that resentment for your relationship in general won’t come out in the care of something as tangible and concrete as the piece of jewellery that directly represents it — well, you’re kidding yourself.

My new temporary engagement ring is kind of a pain in the ass, to be honest, and I’ve thought multiple times of just not wearing it, since he graced my finger with it (and somehow was able to get it to fit perfectly — which I can’t do just by putting it on myself. As to why, I am dumbfounded. I’ve tried everything — in multiple temperatures, at different angles — nothing. Always just a bit slippery.) Now, my custom-designed real-deal engagement ring, which won’t be in existence for another few months or so, will fit me perfectly, so the fact that my temporary is a bit unwieldy gives me extra practise. But the concept remains the same. It takes time, attention, and care. And I can either choose to invest it, and reap the benefits, or neglect it, and suffer the consequences.

Just like the emergent marriage it represents.

Being a largely traditional, natural female dominant, it’s a big switch for me. I can’t do all of the things I want to do right when I want to. It teaches you discipline very quickly. And, I hate to say, but a lot of dommes are lacking in discipline. We like to think just because it’s all about us and we’re in charge, and blah, blah, blah that we’re amazing people who deserve praise and devotion.

We don’t.

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