Now, I’m typically not one to sling mud. There are better things to do with my time, and it’s not exactly the most lady-like. (But then again, there are times that I’m hardly that, too.) But it’s been increasingly obvious to me that those who would qualify for a Mistress Akasha Support Group could easily keep me in business for years. It’s one thing to write a lot of erotica and run online training programmes. It’s another to lead individuals from those programmes to believe they are somehow separate from the others; ‘special’. Furthermore, when she has no intentions on following through on any of her promises. Ever. (Which can be a very frustrating thing. I know.) For some, it’s sheer obliviousness, or the result of oppression, being commitment-phobic, and so on. But for others, it’s a whole other ball-game.

For one, Akasha is a narcissist. Pure and simple, she lives in a fantasy world of her own creation to escape the fact that she has never had the capacity for true intimacy or to find real happiness. And God knows why; her life is fine. It has been for ages. And yet, she continues to use, abuse, and discard men. And men continue to let her because it’s ‘hot’. Sure, the concept may be veritably on fire, but the reality will leave you cold. Because that’s all it is and should be: fantasy. Subs are attracted to her because she’s a ‘true femdom’. Fine. Great. And no doubt, many submissive man’s idea of a female dominant is cold, hard, calculating, cruel, and selfish, but the even colder, harder truth is that such a person makes a shitty girlfriend. And probably an even worse wife.

Think about it. You’re a submissive man, and you’re in love. Finally, you’ve found everything your heart has ever desired: strong, independent, successful, beautiful, popular, and an uber-domme with dozens — maybe hundreds — of men at her feet, or dying to be there. Clearly, you’re more into her than she’s into you, but that’s okay, because she’s at least giving you her time and attention, which means you have more than a snowball’s chance in hell of winning her affection. Perhaps, one day, after your trials and tribulations, she’ll be so proud of your selfless suffering, service, and devotion that she’ll love you as deeply and entirely as you do her, since you were the one man who proved to her that you were everything she wants and needs, and now she’ll be forever yours, and you’ll both live happily ever after in femdom bliss.

Ahhhhhh.

But, wait — come to think of it, I hope you really like waiting, because that’s what you’ll be doing a lot of, and for an indefinite amount of time. That’s right, indefinite. As in potentially — make that, likely — never-ending. Waiting, waiting, waiting for her to call or email you back. To want to see you again. To pay attention to you at all. But this is what you’ve wanted — right? The chance to prove to your one true love, that woman you’ve always been waiting for since you were a young boy with raging hormones, that you’re all that, the bag of chips, and the super-sized beverage? Because it’s in your sweet nature to want to be of service. To give of yourself so completely. You’re sure if you just put in (though, after awhile, it feels more like ‘do’) the time, that you’ll be rewarded with all of your dreams and desires coming true.

Sigh. You poor boy. I don’t know how to break this to you — well, okay, I do, but you’re going to have to really brace yourself — but … she’s just not that into you. Don’t take it personally; she’s just not that into anyone. She can’t be. The only one Mistress Akasha loves is herself. Period. And if it stands in the way of her being able to satisfy the one who means most, then she will do it. Unfortunately, that person is often you.

Now, you’re probably wondering who the fuck am I to be targeting a ‘legendary’ woman who has contributed to BDSM and femdom erotica for over a decade. What could I possibly know, and why would I have such a decidedly nasty approach? Well, the truth is, I don’t know her. We’ve never once met, and have only passed each other on various boards and forums. But once upon a time, my boyfriend was one of those madly in love and carelessly discarded after a year or so after an intense relationship he hoped would last his lifetime. We’re not talking about faceless subs in a chatroom or enrolled in her online training programme. We’re talking flesh and blood, visage a visage, real deal. So, forgive my overly catty tone. I’m sure you can understand. (Although why she let him go is something I never will; nor will I ever do. Of course, in that regard, I can always be grateful to her.)

Maybe she’s absolutely wonderful to some people, or some subs, since I can’t say for sure, and she seems quite popular with a busy website. But one thing’s for certain; she’s left quite the number of broken-hearted, confused submissive men in her wake. And it’s to them that I’ve addressed this.

It’s for them that I’ve made this post. And, well, the fact that I still get riled on occasion if someone mentions ‘Akasha’ (like one of my clients — another of the dismissed — did just recently) and I can’t help but simmer and seethe for a bit.

So, if you wrote her off once upon a time, give yourself a big pat on the back, a ‘good job’ and don’t regret your decision. Since she was no doubt the first one to pull away, the ‘relationship’ was considered done, anyway. You just saved yourself more suffering and heartache by ending it before she could officially. Always feel good about that choice, since it’s the right one.

Now. If you’re one of the many who were left eating her dust (or watching it collect upon the toys you bought for the purpose of playing with or amusing her in some capacity) I’d like to invite you to personally contact me and share your stories, woes, or just let it all out. She’s a cunt, (as far as I’m concerned) and has left you in pretty shitty position. Don’t deny or minimise it; it’s the truth, and you need to be honest about that. Again, just be grateful you’re not the poor bastard who was dumb enough to walk down the aisle with her. (And, really, just because it has little chance of lasting, don’t let that give you some kind of false hope that she’ll one day remember the kind, wonderful, amazing man you are and come running back with apologies and pleas that you’ll find your way back to what you once had. Life isn’t a romantic comedy, and she’s just an aging narcissist for which there aren’t many actresses on the market to play her. Or who would really want to. She’s probably a very sad, lonely person, despite all of the things she could be happy about. But this is the mystery and paradox of the human condition — especially narcissistic personality disorder.

So, how about you? You ever been caught up in Akasha’s Web? Want to talk about it? Hey, I’m always confidential, and my counseling rates are available on my Services tab. You don’t even have to tell me who you are. Just get it off your chest. Let it out, and let it go. Right now the only thing I find ‘legendary’ about Akasha is her relentless ability to lead on, neglect, and finally, abandon the men she’s claimed to have once loved. But I have a better term for that: ‘fucked up’.

The next time you think of your ‘ideal image’ of a femdom, step outside for a minute and quit using cock logic. What’s your domme like outside of the bedroom? When you want something? What of the things that matter to you? Does she deny you every second of the day? Use you for everything she wants and never returns the favour? Does she ever do anything solely for you to show her appreciation for your devotion and submission? Is there any chance — real chance — that she’ll love you the way you love her when it’s all said and done?

If not, then run — don’t walk — away from her. And never, ever look back. I can guarantee you, she won’t be.

Keepin’ it real.

Tags: Abuse versus BDSM, Akasha's Web, Dominant Female, Healing Abuse and Trauma, Mistress Akasha